20 Jan How divorce can affect a man’s health
If you are a man considering divorce or going through it, planning for the impact it might have on your health is a good move. After all, being in as good shape as possible can help you get through your divorce and what comes after that.
Mentally and emotionally
It is possible that your divorce is relatively amicable. Even so, you may be dealing with feelings of anxiety, bitterness, guilt or frustration. At the same time, you could be experiencing happiness and relief. Tolerating mixed emotions does not come easily to many people, and it takes a toll. This may be particularly true if you are happy to be away from your spouse but worry about your children. If your divorce is high conflict, the emotions you feel may be multiplied fivefold or tenfold.
Direct mental and emotional consequences aside, the actual nitty-gritty of divorce is often distracting. You may have a lot of paperwork to deal with, and it takes you away from work. To help with any children, you may feel like you have to cut down on your work or travels, which can build your frustrations. Similarly, arguments over child support are not only emotionally draining, they eat up valuable time.
Physically
Physical health often goes one of two ways, similar to mental and emotional health. On one hand, you may eat less healthfully if good meals are not being prepared. You could also be extra busy and lack sufficient time for the gym or for running. Or you could be too depressed to lace up your shoes.
On the other hand, it is possible that you have newfound time, especially if you do not have the children for a week at a time (or even longer). You might use the extra hours to seek counseling, to exercise more and to fulfill other needs you were never able to before.
Solutions
When a divorce is negatively affecting your health, the best thing to do is to regain control. If your problem is, say, not having enough time for exercise, make a concrete plan to find the time. (You could have walking meetings!) If the issue is that you need more leafy greens and fewer candy bars, could you hire someone to cook on Sundays and freeze meals for the week? If you have not begun proceedings yet, make a plan now for how you will maintain control of your health.
Another solution is to get in touch with a lawyer. Attorneys can take care of much if not all of the detail work, freeing up much of your time.
